thirteen..

Can you believe it, thirteen!  I can't.

This beautiful boy who fills me with awe, and pride and so much love.  

I look at him and he makes me smile.  Actually, I look at him and listen to him talk, with his shakey pitchy voice, and I can't help but giggle.  Watching him move into this new phase of his life is giving us so much joy right now. I know things will most likely change, that's what they say isn't it, the years ahead are supposed to be our toughest yet. But right now, he is joy, and we are loving watching him grow.

I listen to his thoughts, his ideals, his plans for the future and I'm so overwhelmed by all that he is and all he might be. I'm also completely terrified as his independence broadens, of all that lies ahead in the near and distant future, and I pray that he is wise and sensible and has good judgement.

This boy who made me a mother has taught me so much, and we continue to learn from one another every day. He's always been a little beyond his years, an old head on young shoulders, perhaps experiences have shaped him this way. He's faced a lot of challenges in his young life already, and its been hard, really hard.  He doesn't realise just yet, but through his courage he's made a difference, and that's a pretty incredible thing.

Now, as I watch him grow, I don't see him changing so much as I see him becoming more of who he is. His confidence, his humour, his expectations and perceptions.  It's like watching a butterfly ever so gradually emerge, and I'm completely fascinated by him.